Autism

Hi!

Had to run out the door this morning!

Was trying to post pictures. Will try again tomorrow.

I'm not great with details, but I remember reading that many of us in the neurodiverse community struggle with sleep or energy levels.

I would rather watch fireflies than fireworks.

So a little background, I have dated a boy for a long time and then we took a break because of mistakes I made and I'm just going to be honest me not being a great boyfriend.

At the age of 34, being extremely socially reclusive, and being autistic myself, I don't really think I have any chance of getting a relationship. I also have issues with staying attached to neurotypical/non-autistic people, people that drink alcohol regularly (I was raised by an alcoholic grandmother, you probably can put the two together), also I'm disabled in other ways too, etc.

Super excited! My autistic niece is having a Minecraft birthday party. My 3D printer is going full plast printing Minecraft stuff!

Had to go to four stores but I found boots.

Are you autistic and also meditate?

It's new boots day! Getting new boots!

Feel free to answer this question as well. I think it is relevant for all who have masked for a lifetime. Don't rush the question though. Take your time.

Actually today is my kidney anniversary. My wife corrected me yesterday.

I am a large (2XL) male that would like to dress better. But every time I find classy clothes that make me look more professional it's just a sensory nightmare. Rough fabrics, too tight in places, hard for the skin to breathe in, etc.

Today is my 13 year anniversary for my kidney transplant.

Did you meet your turtle quota for the day?

I was doing some building work in my house yesterday and I slowly lost my temper over about 40 minutes but FOR SOME REASON I didn't stop just stop working for the day. Now I have to remove and replace an entire section of my wall because of the damage I caused. It had all just been painted too 😭

Stepped outside this morning to feed the birds and outdoor cats. Started coughing uncontrollably and came right back in after dropping off the food. I think the Canadian wildfire smoke has reached us.

Not sure what I'm doing today, but I'm doing it.

Hi Lemmy!

Is there such a thing? I am not even 100% sure what I am talking about. I noticed with more unmasking I do more of this "deep think" thing. Thinking about some event, occasion, conversation either artificial, not artificial, happened or will happen in future so deep and in details that I could forget about surroundings or start to talk aloud before I notice that I am doing that. Is it part of stimming? Just found on another website that some people have similar experience and they would consider it as stimming. Do you know about some scientifical researches about particularly this type of stimming and what is your experience? Note that I (probably) mean type of stimming that does not require any physical, verbal, visional interactions with environment, but this stimming where only your thoughts are involved. What is your experience?

All is quiet on the cat ranch.

We went to a Slavic festival today here in our small town. Plenty of music and dancing and a small parade. Tried Halusik for the first time. A very filling dish.

Cats are being extra today.

Kansas is not as flat as people think.

i cant wrap my head around it

It's going to be a very day like day today. I would describe it as a day in daylight hours, where people are doing daytime things. Yes it's definitely going to be one of those days.

Didn't sleep well last night. Ended up having weird dreams.

Just going to hide in the basement today.

Oh happy Saturday!

I drive a big four door truck for work. Most of my colleagues will just fill the back up with tools and stuff. I however keep mine clean and organized. This way I can use the backseat as an office vs trying to use a computer with a steering wheel in my way. Recently my boss let me tint the windows for security in case I keep anything back there. Now I have my very own mobile privacy box! I even got a sun shade for the windshield for complete privacy.

"Why can't you be normal!?" Ummm why can't you be weird?

Hold on, I know what you are thinking! "He's a telepath" Was I right?

It's Memorial Day in the U.S. Which means my morning TV routine is going to be off.

My cats like to go out into the garage and roll around on the dirty floor. Then come in and demand I clean them.

Yesterday was my three anniversary at work.

I feel kinda alone in it

I have monkey toes. I use my feet as hands if I'm barefoot. Drop a pen? Not bending over for that. Cat drops the ball at my feet. Well just going to hand it up to myself.

My 5yr old son has just been diagnosed. The diagnosis was binary (yes:no) rather than a scale which was the first lesson for me.

I'm awake. Yeah I'm awake. I just have to stay awake. Didn't sleep well last night.

I always got called out for being weird throughout my life but NOBODY ever mentioned to me they thought I was so I just got exhausted of being misunderstood and misinterpreted sometimes and tried learning the social etiquette my entire life, somethings I don't necessarily agree but I do it anyway and try understanding others doing for the sake of fitting in and I just got quite used to it, miserable at times yes, but it's become my life all of that and any quirkness I just assumed to be due to having more individuality than others since no one ever questioned me directly if I had anything other than just plainly calling me weird. I've honestly been hopeless with life more than I'd like to admit so I'm not sure how I'm going to process all of this, I figured if anyone could understand or relate to this life experience I have would be others diagnosed as well, has it been like this for everyone here and felt this same way when diagnosed (for those who were diagnosed after already becoming adults)? I'm overwhelmed and needed to talk to someone about this but I have no one other than my psychologist however I'm not comfortable discussing it with her right now about it and since Lemmy is semi-anonymous/anonymous I feel a bit more inclined to talk about it here 😞

There was a nicotine + adhd thread today in c/whitepeopletwitter@sh.itjust.works and I got to write a few paragraphs about my favorite subject: anything tobacco. I don't know particularly what is so cool about it, but I just can't get enough information on the subject. Old fashioned snuffboxes, cigarette boxes and holders, pipes... And the rich history and culture of each brand and style and how it evolved in every part of the world is just so interesting to me. So it made me curious about what are some of the other more unconventional special interests around this community

I torture myself with a tongue scraper every morning. I hate it, but it helps with bad breath.

Windows are done! Now we need blinds...

I used to rip/rub my clothes - absolutely loved the texture of the hems of a ripped up pair of jeans. It’s socially a little odd to keep a piece of denim in your pocket to fidget with.

We're supposed to be getting new windows today. But it is going to rain all day so I think may have to reschedule.

Good morning everyone.

12TET (12 tone equal temprament) is a system which divides the octave (eg. C3-C4) in 12 equal parts and it's the system used on many instruments, especially in western music. Maybe I'm getting bored of it bc of the fact that I've probably heard every possible combination of notes in this system. The thing i hate about it is how limiting it is, because in between even a semitone there's a world of possibilities and i wanna study and use microtones. The thing is guitars are caged in a 12 tone system, as many western instruments are. My point? I WANT A FRETLESS GUITAR/INSTRUMENT I WANNA DISCOVER MICROTONAL CHORD CHANGES bit of a rant

It is Friday. And I am done. This will be my first day off in two weeks.

The on call is over now. yay.

Sorry, no answers here. I was asking you...

i think that'd be cool

If I don't write it down I forget! I'm using one note but it's fiddly and not great. Anyone know a good note taking app? Gotta be free!

Yep, Yeppers, sure thing we can do that.

My new Irish Tin Whistle came in! It is loud in a good way.

yesterday i went to a concert of a friend of mine, then with some friends we went to his house for an afterparty. I had probably one of the most fun nights in my life (also bc we were all kinda ND). Then I went home, and all of it came crashing down: i was back in the place where i feel unwelcome, where im forced to live with my parents, who i came to hate throughout my life bc of how they give conditional love, have had many outbursts against me, fueled my meltdowns and punished me for them. Some days ago they found some weed in my room and my mom literally started talking to me as if i wasnt human, calling me a junkie and stuff. They never listen to me, when i talk about my feelings they always manage to either give useless advice or turn it personal and start a fight. For instance I've completely lost interest in uni bc they kept pushing me on the topic when i had major difficulties with it, and I'm considering dropping out bc i can't take it anymore. I can't move out bc I'm broke, if i don't finish uni I'll never be able to sustain myself outside of this fascist shithole called Italy, and i can't handle a job, let alone with uni. I feel trapped, and all i want to do is hibernate myself and forget about this world. I feel like I'm a mistake on this planet

My day started at 2:40AM with a high temp alarm at a site an hour away. Once I fixed this, an outage came in an hour from that site. And now I am working on that.

I am an autistic 29 year old guy who started developing a serious addiction to Instagram and TikTok during the COVID pandemic. It got worse around 2022 when I lost my job. TikTok, like Reddit, does have lots of very informational and interesting content on there and I enjoyed watching lots of travel videos as well as many math and science related videos. However even those “educational” travel videos can become toxic as it’s mainly travel influencers who travel all over the world to visit nice places and make give us FOMO. In reality, they most likely come from wealthy families, have an abnormally high carbon footprint flying to all sorts of different places, and likely staying in cheap Airbnbs instead of hotels.